Who the heck are these people?!?!

So my brother has this writing style analyzer on his blog, and let's just say I got a bit carried away......

The problem is, it says I write like a bunch of people I've never heard of. It's not that this offends my ego (for real!), it's just that I have no frame of reference, so I don't know what to think of the results. It's quite annoying. I did get some famous authors, one of which made sense, and the other did not.

I pasted this story I did for a class, and it said I write like Ray Bradbury. I guess I can see that. But how about this: I pasted in my review of one of the Ideal Husband movies from this blog, and it said I write like H.P. Lovecraft. Now, I'd love to believe that's true, but I just don't see it in that review. I guess it has really long sentences.....?

Then I pasted in the prologue from a story I'm working on and it said I write like David Foster Wallace. Who is that? Apparently he's some kind of vaguely comedic well-reviewed person. One or two of his titles on Amazon look familiar.....

Most of my reviews from this blog came up as Cory Doctorow. I guess he writes sci-fi...? No idea. I assume the program just looks at sentence structure, maybe some word choices. Obviously not content.

Oh, well. I'll be going with this one:

I write like
H. P. Lovecraft

I Write Like by Mémoires, journal software. Analyze your writing!

Chap Hop! Ukuleles! WAR!

This is kind of weird.... so, I've meaning to write a post for a while about ukuleles. No, really. I find it is impossible to feel sad when someone is playing a ukulele, particularly if it is 20s-ish music. For example, this is a delightful song I stumbled across on youtube.

Then I was reading The Chap, one of my favorite magazines of all time (on their website), and they mentioned Mr B the Gentleman Rhymer, who is performing at this year's ball. I remembered him because of the Chap Manifesto, which he set to rap in honor of the publication's tenth birthday. Anyway, here is one of his videos:

I think his banjolele is quite catchy, but apparently there is already a king of chap hop, and he is Professor Elemental. Here is what he has to say:

And the response? I think it's a response....?

Apparently some of the fans are pretty die-hard, but I like them both. Although, Prof. E. does have an album called Indifference Engine, so that gets him brownie points. Anyway, there is one thing we can all agree on:

Christmas Post! On time this year!

I found the cutest Christmas ornaments! They were 2 for $5 at Costplus! Yay cheap! And they aren't glass, so my darling kitties can't break them! Yay indestructible! There were a whole bunch, but I got the cutest ones, a pig and a zebra in dirigibles! There were also pandas and elephants, and there were also the same animals in hot air balloons, but aerostatic flying machines ought to be steerable. Here they are!

The pig looks like he's having the time of his life, but the zebra doesn't look so sure of this newfangled contraption.

Also, notice the pine cone behind the pig. It's still attached to the tree! That's why we got this particular tree.

Some Reviews

I just read what may be the best fantasy story I've seen in years! It's called "Nine Pound Hammer", and it's the first book in the Clockwork Dark Trilogy, by John Claude Bemis. Yes, "clockwork dark" is as cool as it sounds! The author is a musician from the south, so he naturally knows about John Henry, and decided to turn the story into epic fantasy, using all kinds of American folklore, and steampunkish flair. The main character is a boy named Ray, who was is headed south on a train with many other orphans, following the pull of his father's mysterious Lodestone. When he sleeps with the stone, he has dreams about being chased by a monstrous clockwork hound. He runs away and joins a traveling medicine show, where he learns some very interesting things. There are some very cool twists and the characters are all awesome. I couldn't put this book down, and I can't wait to read "The Wolf Tree"!

On to games! I played Red Dead Redemption a while back, and I really liked it, with a couple of reservations. First, the bad, then the good, then the ugly:

The minor complaint I had about this game was the lack of depth. Heresy, they'll say! It's a huge sprawling sandbox style game. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sandbox style games tend to be very repetitive, and this was no exception. Sure, the different environments looked different and had different animals (freakin' mountain lions!) but you pretty much do the same things all the time. I wanted more control over the story - since morality is a big feature of the story, it would have been nice to be able to make a few choices, pick out who your allies are, that sort of thing. They managed it in Steambot Chronicle (not that that wasn't repetitive).

Also, while they do an excellent job establishing time and place, it manages to feel very static. A major feature of the setting is the end of the wild west, the spread of the railroad, the introduction of the car! And yet, I never got a sense of the tension, excitement, or melancholy that should go along with this change, outside of a couple of scenes where it was specifically mentioned.

My more overarching problem was a typical one for Rockstar. Although it seems like their hearts are starting to be in the right place, they still have the puerile tendency to substitute the sordid for the mature. This doesn't make it any edgier, and it certainly doesn't make it any deeper. I would have liked for even one of the Stranger subquests to have a happy ending.

Now for the good: This game is beautiful! Sure, all kinds of games are pretty to look at, and all kinds of games use it as an excuse for lousy gameplay. But this is different - it is like being drawn into the pages of Arizona Highways! It makes the game so immersive and engaging, you can almost smell the greasewood and pinetrees, and feel the gritty wind shift from hot to cold when a monsoon blows in. The graphics and sound design really make a difference here.

I love the story too! The premise is your character used to be an outlaw, and he tried to settle down and be a rancher with his wife and son, but federal agents kidnapped them in order to force you to hunt down your old gang. You have a whole bunch of missions where you do just that, with a few twists and obstacles thrown in. It's all tons of fun, and there's enough variety to keep it interesting - everything to storming forts to herding cattle, from robbing trains to dueling in the streets! There are sidequests too, which start off fun, but after a whole bunch of them ending badly, I started to dread them popping up. Your actions determine both your fame and honor ratings, which change how the random characters and especially law enforcement interact with you. It's way easier if you behave yourself (Hint: if you see a guy running and screaming, make sure the guys chasing him aren't wearing silver stars before you shoot at them.) If things get too hot you can pay off your bounty.

~ Spoiler alert! Highlight to keep reading ~

I really like the last few missions, where you finally find the last bad guy. And then the game keeps going! You go home to your ranch, and do missions for your wife, and teach your boy to shoot and rope, and bring supplies to the neighboring ranch! You start to build a real life, and offer your son more than you had. He wants to be a writer, and is enchanted with novels of the wild west. Or he wants to be a rich industrialist. You tell him he be whatever he wants, but he has to bring the cattle in first. I actually thought this was the most enjoyable part of the game. Of course, the g-men won't just leave you alone, and they come after you. You get your family to safety and a Butch and Sundance style stand-off, and get killed. Your family comes back, and the credits play as they bury you, and the soundtrack is "Bury Me Not on the Lone Prairie". I cried. It was a great ending.

Or was it?

The ugly: They had to go and ruin the ending. After the credits, four years have passed, your wife has died, and your son has become a gunslinger. You play as him now. You hunt down the retired agent who set you up and murder him in cold blood. Then you ride around and do nothing - no more missions, no more story, no nothing. What the hell did this guy's father fight and die for?!?! It is the worst possible ending they could possibly have had. It pretty much ruined the game for me.

Not the Coming Thing

or, For Science!

~ a short rant ~

I was looking at light bulbs last night, pondering stocking up on a few more incandescent bulbs before they become illegal. But I was also looking at compact fluorescent bulbs, because I do use them in most of my lights, especially the ones I use for extended periods.

I couldn't find any that were the right color, only the hideous bright blue ones, or "Daylight". I prefer "soft white" whereas in incandescent bulbs I prefer "soft white", "Edison", or "reveal", although only in my living room, because it's already purple and looks lovely with the slightly purple light.

All these names are, frankly, ridiculous, with the exception of "soft white", which is pretty understandable. Another point of confusion is brightness. We are used to measuring brightness in watts (this hurts me) despite the fact that the coating on white light bulbs slightly affects the brightness. Watts are a measure of how much power they draw, which is different for fluorescent lamps. At least they tell you what wattage of normal light bulb they look like. LED lights are hopeless in this regard, and they will never ever be able to force me to buy one. They'll have to kill me first.

The proper measure of brightness is lumens, or, alternatively, foot candles. We have a standard, folks, why not use it?

But my biggest problem with all these different bulbs is the color and quality of light. LEDs are out of the question because the quality of light is just not there - it has a weird focus because of the shape of the plastic bubble, and this gives it hideous shadows that I find distracting. The color is also quite ugly - the white light from LEDs is just too blue for my taste, for most applications.

Fluorescent bulbs are ok in terms of quality of light - the shadows are a little murky, but I'll live. My problem with fluorescent bulbs is the color. Not all of them are hideous - they do come in a soft white that looks pretty good to the eye. However, usually they have a horrible green or yellow tinge to them that you can see on film or even in digital photos. It's why most photos taken indoors look yellower than they used to, unless your camera has a specific white balance setting for fluorescent.

One of the settings where they'll have to pry the incandescent bulbs out of my cold dead hands is the bathroom mirror. Fluorescent bulbs make me even paler, the circles under my eyes even bluer, and various blotches even redder. It also makes my makeup look gray and dull. The ladies room at my church has overhead fluorescents, which is a problem because that's where brides get ready. They are nervous enough without looking in the mirror and seeing a Tim Burton character!

But there is a solution, offered to us by science! Colors of light can be expressed in numbers! Any photographer knows this. It's called color temperature. Sunlight is 5600K, and incandescent light is 3200K. It's the reason why shooting indoor film outside gives you bluish pictures, and outdoor film will give you orange pictures if you use it inside. There are filters to correct this. Why aren't light bulb colors expressed this way.

Or maybe they are. As I was looking at light bulbs, I saw that some of them did in fact have the color temperature written on the box. The "Daylight" compact fluorescents had "6500K" written down the side. The only problem is, that's 900K bluer than daylight, which I can attest to, having accidentally bought two of the hideous things. One actually worked quite well up inside the ductwork in my former mad science lab. But I have no place where the other doesn't offend the eye. There is no bulb that looks like daylight, except those ones that plants like, and they're too hot to use. Now, color temperature is hardly common knowledge, but you would think that someone involved in the manufacture of light bulbs would have studied lighting at some point.

So, nice try, but until somebody puts a real measure of both brightness and color temperature on light bulbs, I don't think everyone should be forced to make the switch. It's just one example of ecomentalists making our lives smaller, meaner, and less beautiful. That and Sunchip bags.

The Coming Thing!

So, after watching the live broadcast of this year's E3, I believe I can safely say I have found another Coming Thing. And it's weird for me to pick this one out, given my skepticism for Nintendo's recent gimicky junk. Drumroll please:

The 3DS! Its marvelous! It's 3D, without glasses (I think the screen is polarized?) Now I am not a fan of 3D movies. I think it's a fad that should have died with poodle skirts and radium watches and stayed dead. The new gray glasses really don't make it any better. My biggest problem with 3D, as with any technology in a movie, is that filmmakers use it as a crutch. Look at the slew of really terrible CGI movies out there, before Pixar dominated that niche (not that people don't continue to make bad ones). If a movie needs 3D to make it fun to watch, then not only is it not worth the extra 3 bucks, it's probably not worth the regular price either. If the movie is good anyway, maybe 3D is kind of fun, but again, not worth the extra money. I like the use of 3D in one place - the Bug's Life show at Disney's California Adventure. Not to give anything away, but it's how William Castle would have done 3D if he'd had lots of money. It's the perfection of the technology used in "Honey I Shrunk the Audience".

Enough about movies and shows. We're talking games here! Going back to Disneyland (I wish I was) the Toy Story game is a good example of how this is successful. It's a shooting game, with 3D stages and projectiles projected on the screen, that totally look like they're coming out of your gun. The depth looks very realistic, and adjusting your aim is very intuitive. That's what Nintendo has done with the 3DS. One of the developers explained how they thought it was important to be able to judge the distance between yourself and your target. You can also adjust the level of depth, and even turn the 3D off (it's truly magical). I think games are better for 3D, since they would not just use it for a different look, but for a whole different way of interacting (imagine the Zelda puzzles!!!!!). Developers are going to have a field day making games for this.

And what game are they launching with the handheld? KID ICARUS!!!!!!!! I turned to my brother when they showed the 3DS and said "I hope they make good flying games for this" and then they announced Kid Icarus and I squeed. They made it specially for the 3DS, under a secret project called Project Sora (mysterious). The part with the lasers will look awesome in 3D.

Which brings me to Zelda..... no, there's not a 3D Zelda yet (can't wait though). I'm talking about Legend of Zelda Skyward Sword!!!!! For the Wii, and for the win! It's beautiful, and has realistic swordfighting! It's also pretty! It's bright, but not cartoony, keeping the realistic style but with nifty painterly cel-shading. It kind of reminds me of Ocarina of Time, but without the polygons. The environments are huge and gorgeous, and you can use items in awesome new ways. All my horrifying doubts and sickening imaginings evaporated in the glow of the new trailer. I can't wait!

Also, if anyone from Nintendo is reading this (one of my five readers is a Nintendo developer, right? Right?) .....Zelda.... has gone from sailboats....to steamboats.....to trains......there needs to be an airship Zelda games for the 3DS!

Nashville flood!

This is a story that has gotten almost no coverage, even though it looks like it will be more economically devastating than hurricane Katrina. The Cumberland river has overflowed its banks, and reached the thousand year flood level! People were rowing canoes across the stage at the Grand Ol Opry. The people there have been amazing, pulling together, helping each other, getting things done. There hasn't been any looting or things of that nature.

However, the devastation is real, and a lot of bands are trying to raise money. But some bands are out of luck. The Outlanders had their bus flooded, and most of their gear was destroyed. Abney Park's Captain Robert has this link on his livejournal, about where people can send donations, mostly of supplies, leather, brass, machine bits, etc. You can send donations of money to help out the whole city and surrounding areas at the links on this site.

A Coming Thing!!!

Not to get political, but as someone who loves science as much as I do, and who has "Trip to the Moon" tattooed on my shoulder, recent decisions regarding NASA have left me rather despondent. But check this out! It seems the Air Force is working on something of their own, assuming the project doesn't get gutted.

They've launched an unmanned spaceship, which can land itself, and may be the beginning of the next generation to replace the shuttles. Our astronauts should not have to hitch a ride on Russian and Chinese rockets, dammit! This is a very cool machine - now if only it or its descendants were allowed to take us back to moon, and on to Mars!

More fun with youtube

So I made another video. It's not exactly steampunk, but it is from 1906 (apparently). Someone stood on the front of a streetcar going down Market Street in San Francisco, and they filmed everything that went by. It's pretty crazy, particularly the lack of traffic laws.

There are a lot of videos that use this film, and also this one, which I like a lot, that juxtaposes the same film with one taken perhaps two weeks later, after the devastating earthquake. The speed in these videos seems to be the speed at which the film was digitized, and I think it looks eerily slow.

Not mine though. I sped it up to the right speed - as we all know, people walked about 25 percent faster back then. It's how the West was won, people! Or it could have had something to do with undercranking the camera and then playing it back at normal speed. Anyway, it's way funnier if you speed it up, and of course, pair it Vernian Process's incomparable version of the Maple Leaf Rag. I picked an arbitrary speed for the video, which then ended up shorter than the song, so I added some remixy parts to fit the music better.

What you end up with is a Where's Waldo of chaos and insanity. As you watch, try to spot the following:

• 2, possibly 3, newspaper boys
• 1 newspaper man
  
• 2 men nearly getting run over
• 2 women nearly getting run over (at the same time)
• 2 horse-drawn wagons nearly getting run over
• a car driving the wrong way
• a horse galloping very fast
• a wagon going the wrong way
• 4 cars cutting off the streetcar
• a guy in an apron chasing another guy in an apron
• 2 guys hanging onto a car
• a wagon with a skinny horse cutting off a car, and a streetcar

Let me know if I have miscounted, or missed any other funny things.

My heart exploded, I squealed, I fell over, and this is awesome!

Then I came back to life to post this:

It's the latest set in their series of collectible pins that appear in all the shops at Disneyland. There's more info here.

Now, there are two big, glaring problems here. No, it's not that big bad corporate Disney is commercializing Steampunk (get a haircut, hippie). No. Worse. Where the heck is Launchpad?!? And have they never heard of the Disney Afternoon?

Oh well. As I'll be in Disneyland in a week and a half, I may have to look for some of these, since they're awesome. Aviatrix Daisy and Sheriff Goofy are particularly cute, but I'm once again reminded of how uncomfortable it must be for a duck to wear heels... I wonder if any of them hung out with Scrooge and Goldie in the Yukon during the gold rush.

Railroad Day!

Today I went to the Silver Spike Festival in Tucson, which commemorates the 130th anniversary of the railroad coming through Tucson, Arizona. The mayor, in proper mayor attire, seen here to the right of the lady in the white dress (just his top hat, really, but that's what I mean by "proper mayor attire"), proclaimed March 20th "Railroad Day" in Tucson, and there will be festivities every year from now on.

This is good news, because it was a really fun day. They put bunting on the train, which was restored and presented to the city in 1955, in honor of the 75th anniversary of the railroad. When I rule the world, all occasions of civic pride will have bunting.

The great grandson of Estevan Ochoa, an entrepreneur who presented the railroad with a silver spike in 1880, gave a speech, and it included part of Estevan's original words. He said "we must bend our shoulders to the oars of progress, and... become the shining star in the constellation of the United States". The actual silver spike is in the case in front of the train.

They read a lot of the speeches from back then, when people really had a way with words, remarking on how the iron horse, "with pounding, steel-flocked flanks" had linked Tucson with the civilized world, and how men "with their pluck, courage, and capital, brought the iron wheels of progress" etc etc. There were gunfights, and a cannon (fired quite unexpectedly by guys dressed like they were from the old Presidio in 1775), and tons of people in western outfits! Some of the dresses were really amazing, as were the hats:

There were a few steampunk people in the mix, as well - one of them gave me his card (I was dressed steampunk enough to stand out, I guess). Here are some more cool outfits, and a statue of Wyatt Earp and Doc Holiday, commemorating the time they killed Frank Stilwell in a gunfight at the train station in Tucson, in March of 1882. It was part of the Arizona War, which began with the famous Gunfight at the O.K. Corral. Stilwell may have killed Morgan Earp.

Mysteriously Steampunk Old Cartoons!

So I was looking up "Come Take a Trip in My Airship" on youtube, because it's an awesome song, and a picture on deviantArt reminded me of it. It was a popular song in 1904, and it's a very cute love song. I found a few videos of a singer named Billy Murray singing it on old phonographs (odd, because the song is from a girl's point of view), and I also stumbled upon this cartoon.

There's this one too, which has the whole song with the lyrics, and is on acid. At 2:48, the adorableness begins, but the whole cartoon is pretty awesome. I like that the second cartoon has it as a duet. Johnny Cash sang it too, but not all the verses. Who would have been a good singer to sing the woman's part with Johnny Cash?

Here's another video using the song, with some really great old airship clips!

Steampunk Quiz

I made this a while ago, and stuck it on the bottom of my blog, but the link is broken now. It never worked that great anyway. So here is the real link to my steampunk quiz. Put your results in the comments!

Some awesome planes!

Does anyone else think this thing looks like something out of a Miyazaki movie? It's the fe2b, a pusher fighter from WWI, that, despite its looks, was apparently pretty deadly and sturdy. In fact, Max Immelmann may have been killed by one, and the Red Baron had to make a forced landing after being shot by Donald Cunnel from a fee. It may have looked like this - that's the kind of plane the Red Baron was flying that day:

That was in 1916 and 17, when they had synchronizer gears, and didn't even need pushers anymore. See, the idea was, you could fire backwards and forwards, without shooting through the propeller, since it was behind you.

There were hazards though - the gunner was not strapped in in any way, and actually had to stand on their seat and shoot the rear the gun! And if you crashed, you had the engine come down on top of you. Also, the tail section was very delicate, compared to a normal fuselage.

I think they're cool though. Here's one that I drew, but I moved the guns, just because. Actually, it was going to be part of a different illustration.

PSA number 2

I found this on facebook, and I think it's really cool. Xerox had a bunch of kids draw these pictures, and you can pick one and send it as a thank-you card to the troops. It's free,which is great for people who want to help, but don't have much money. It's also cool to see how much these kids admire the soldiers, and the way they express it. I remember in school, we drew pictures for soldiers during the Gulf War, and I tried really hard to think of something really good. I don't remember what I drew, but I know it wasn't good as most of these pictures. The troops are doing a great job, especially now with their offensive in Marjah, but it also means the fight is getting harder, so lets encourage them.

Some steampunkery I have been making

So, all of you who have been hanging on my every post have probably been wondering, where is this series on my growing steampunk collection I promised way back when? Something about jodhpurs? Well, the jodhpurs article has spiraled out of control, and needs an entire spring break to get it done. This always happens to me. In the meantime, heres some steampunk stuff I've been working on.

I've been working on top hats for a while, making them the right size for ladies, covering them in luxurious fabrics, etc. My friend, who's a belly dancer, commissioned some for her troupe, and they are quite fancy! This is probably my favorite:

They are fun to wear, and I've finally gotten them to stay put perched elegantly on top of the head. (The secret of how they did it in Victorian time??? Hair Extensions! No kidding. Not for everyday wear, necessarily, but the big fancy hair? Yep. Fake.) They look like this when you wear them:

A couple of weeks ago I made a fascinator too. It was really easy, except for getting the feathers to all point the right way....

Currently, I'm working on a totally new type of hat!!! I'll get pics up soon.

I forgot!

I was going to use another example in my last post, about technological optimism. I just got Spirit Tracks, the steampunk Legend of Zelda! It's so cute it made me fly away on a hot air balloon to the land of squee, although some people don't like it so much.

There's a temple in the middle of the map that's a roundhouse, and it turns when you unlock more tracks to new realms! As you explore and meet people, they ask you to do things for them (it is Zelda, after all). Said things involve driving them, their friends, and their groceries all over creation. And it's totally fun! All the townspeople are so excited that they are connected by rails now, and they can sell their cuccoos, and meet strange creatures, and see snow. People import goods from far away and start businesses, and all kinds of stuff.

See? Technological optimism. Seriously, it's an awesome game, for many reasons. Although I think I like Phantom Hourglass better. It was harder and had more Linebeck.

The Coming Thing!

...or, Steampunk and Technological Optimism.

There are a couple of reasons I like steampunk more than other subcultures, particularly the ones that are based on aesthetics, music and clothing (music was actually a late comer to mainstream steampunk, if there is such a thing, but now with Abney Park and some other bands, there is definitely that force in the subculture). Also, as far as trends based on literature are concerned, it's less horrifying than most. The first is just the cool style and the fun of it, obviously, the fun coming largely from going "hm, how would you power that with steam?"The other is the optimism. Steampunk takes place in a past with a bright future.

In the nineteenth century, there was the feeling that science would ease the labor of mankind, and free us up for pursuits of art and intellect. We will forget for now that the intellectual movements in the nineteenth century led to slaughter on a scale never before imagined. Anyway, that was the feeling, as demonstrated in the Universal Expositions and Worlds Fairs. Good steampunk reflects this - technology makes the world better, not worse. Our ability to imagine and create is a great strength. New worlds of discovery were being opened up all the time. Even though the technology in steampunk is primitive by today's standards, because it is alternate history, it is forward-looking, and it also keeps alive the idea that the things we make should be beautiful (look at an iPod and try to stay awake). Besides, the stories are usually more about people than machines, which is another nice thing about the genre. Not all steampunk is optimistic, however, and I think it suffers.

Some examples of both types:

The original steampunk (no, not Difference Engine, which I haven't read) - I mean, of course, Jules Verne! As a good science fiction writer, he dreamed up all kinds of new technology, as well as better and more useful versions of existing tech, and portrayed them as wondrous. He also had a number of mad scientist characters. Consider "20,000 Leagues Under the Sea". Captain Nemo is crazy! He's kind of a bad dude! It's interesting that he is a pacifist and believes that society must be controlled through force to protect all the stupid, dangerous people - did Verne recognize something about 19th c. society and science that others, like Wells, did not? Hold that thought. Anyway, the Nautilus itself, and the underwater paradise that Nemo would like to retreat to when he's not terrorizing the seas, is marvelous and good, and who wouldn't want one? It's how Nemo uses it that's wrong, not the science itself. I think, though this is sort of a generalization, that the technological advancements in the 19th c. were good for the world, while the social science was disastrous. Science can't perfect society, or people, but it is worth pursuing . . . FOR SCIENCE!!!

For another, ultimately frustrating, take on that, let's consider "Steamboy". Now, this film is cool-looking. It has some really neat steam machines, and cool action sequences. The animation is very smooth and expensive. It's fun to watch, for the first half of it. The story is just lame. Basically, this kid's father and grandfather are scientists. They invent a magic steam valve that apparently can concentrate steam at low temperatures . . .or something? Anyway, the experiment blows up in the dad's face, boiling him alive and leaving only a damp skeleton covered in pulp- I mean, causing mild skin irritation. They secretly send the valve to the kid and bad guys come after it, until he gets it back to them at the Crystal Palace Exposition. . . and hilarity ensues. Really boring eye-rolling hilarity, until the explosions start. And don't stop. For like an hour. It is Katsuhiro Otomo, after all.

There's some rubbish about what science should be used for, and the characters, who are just stand-ins for cliched concepts, talk about it for ages. On the one hand, science should never, ever, ever be used for war. On the other hand, when dewy-eyed scientists try to use it for peace, the government, or actually the military, will corrupt it for war. But on the other hand, or C, it's kinda fun, for amusement park rides, and barrel organs, and other sundries. And that's pretty much the conclusion we're left with. Science as an amusing sideshow!?!? What kind of steampunk is this?

I think the steampunk work that best sums up the spirit of the times is Brisco County Junior, from which the title of this post is taken. Brisco is a bounty hunter, drifting around the west, looking for the Coming Thing. He doesn't know what it is, but he can feel it. After all, it's almost a new century. Throughout the show, he and his friends discover many coming things, clever, often hilarious, steampunk versions of all kinds of modern items. Sometimes they are devices the bad guys are using, other times they are made by the good guys and help our heroes out. Usually though, they are just the hard work of regular people that Brisco encounters. He's pleased to see what their dreams are, and how the future is being made. It's the spirit of the west. It's a pretty Shonen Jump-like philosophy for a show that's really just meant to be fun, and is certainly not scientifically rigorous. I guess you could say it's steam-pulp.

They also have the Orb, a magically powerful device that can do many things to advance the plot. It's also kind of like science, and in fact at one point is described simply as "potential". When the bad guys get ahold of it, it is terribly dangerous, and ultimately self-destructive, but it helps the good guys a lot, while tempting and leading astray some of the minor characters. It's not actually deep, per se, it's just a handy plot device, used to reveal things about the characters.

That's my lengthy two cents.

Haiti

This isn't steampunk, but it's important. Surely everyone knows about the earthquakes in Haiti. Brass Goggles had a great idea and put a link to Doctors Without Borders on their site. Another place to donate is the Red Cross. I only have three or four readers, but if everyone donates just a little bit, it will help.

There is some good news. Our armed forces have gotten there and are coordinating the release of supplies, shoring up the efforts of the religious institutions who were the first to help, but are stretched thin. The 82nd Airborne got there a couple days ago with cargo planes, and the Coast Guard is there, along with a hospital ship from the Red Cross. The generous aid from around the world is able to start finding its way to people, but the news is still devastating to watch on TV, and there are people in need on the outskirts of the cities too. Please keep praying for Haiti and ask your friends to try and give something too.

Baby's First Steampunk, Revisited

Today, I had the pleasure of working in the children's section at Barnes and Noble. It's my favorite part of my job, actually, because the kids are so into all these stories, and most of them are really cute. Plus, a lot of kids' books now have a little steampunk flavor. I also like that we can wear interesting clothes and visible tattoos at work, like this steampunkish ensemble I had on today:

Anyway, I suddenly realized, in my previous discussion of what might be a child's first introduction to steampunk-type notions, assuming he didn't have steampunk parents, I only thought of Talespin, which I still think is Baby's First Steampunk, and Mike Mulligan and His Steam Shovel. But I left out something huge! Thomas the Tank Engine! I didn't think of it because it wasn't on when I was a kid, but there were several kids in the the store today who knew all kinds of stuff about steam engines! We have a big train set in the children's section, with the little wooden Thomas trains on it. One of the kids, who was probably about three, was telling his mom all about how the engine was thirsty, and he was getting a drink under the water tower, and what a roundhouse was, and what the caboose did. There was also a girl who made all the engines drive around and get water, and use their brakes down the hill, and wait for the signals to get into the roundhouse. A couple of other kids played games that were similarly detailed about how trains worked. I just think it's cool how kids are still learning about a lifestyle and technology from a bygone age.

So Thomas the Tank Engine gets points for the coveted title, Baby's First Steampunk.

Steampunk is pretty famous...

... or at least famous enough to rate its own endcap at Barnes and Noble, where I work as a purveyor of fine reading material. Imagine my surprise, upon clocking in, to turn around and discover a display called Steampunk Fiction! There were a handful of the latest offerings in the genre, and I thought it was a little odd. My colleagues had, with the exception of one or two people, not heard of steampunk, except from me, but I guess someone in the company back east had.

What I found odd specifically, aside from the very existence of such an endcap, was the selection of titles. There is actually some entertaining steampunk out there right now, but they missed some of the good ones, like Affinity Bridge, and included, of all things, Golden Compass. I think there is a fine line. Golden Compass looks steampunk, which, really, I suppose, is enough, since steampunk is a visual style. But the story had nothing to do with steam machines or Victorian science, and really only touches on any kind of science tangentially. I know this seems awfully stubborn, but the mere presence of airships doesn't make something steampunk. Is the alternative universe in Doctor Who where Rose gets stuck, and Mickey turns into a badass, steampunk? No.

I just don't think Golden Compass is steampunk, but if you watch the movie and fast-forward through the boring parts, it sure is pretty. Stardust is more steampunk, with the coolest airship in any movie, probably.

Another couple of books that looked good, but which I haven't read are Boneshaker (it's not about a bicycle, but that was why it caught my eye, along with the shiny goggles on the cover), and Grand Tour, which looks adorable and fun. They also had Leviathan, by Scott Westerfield, which is a totally epic steampunk version of World War I, for teeneagers! It has great illustrations and good characters, and better still, a journal that matches it. I saw the cover, and totally wanted one, but not enough to spend money on it. But then I looked inside, and discovered.... the pages aren't lined!!! What they called a journal was, in fact, a sketchbook, the holy grail of little books that fit in your purse! It has lovely, cream-colored paper with just enough weight and texture to get a nice line, and it doesn't smudge. I bought two.

But I digress. What book do you think was not on that endcap? Something that really should have been. Difference Engine! William Gibson's Difference Engine was not on the steampunk endcap, and woe to humble book grunts who try and change the required title lists handed down to us. Now, I personally could not get through the first couple of chapters of that book, and I find it really dull, since it doesn't feel, to me, like the characters fit in that time period. It's really more cyberpunk with fancier clothes. That being said, if you are a bookstore, and you are taking it upon yourself to introduce a genre to the nation, shouldn't you include that genre's seminal work?

Not including Difference Engine, and including Golden Compass, shows their understanding of steampunk to be purely based on style, and not based on the philosophy or themes that make it a defined genre of science fiction, however fanciful it gets. The sheer variety and creativity is a big part of what makes steampunk so appealing, but a nod to the canon would be nice. I myself would have included some Jules Verne for good measure, even though, obviously, he was just writing science fiction in his time, steampunk not yet being a twinkle in his eye.

Still, I'm glad people are reading steampunk books, and writing steampunk books, and that the new ones seem pretty good. Perhaps there will be a market clamoring for more when I eventually crank mine out...